How Do You Want Your Kids to Remember You? A workbook for fathers who have harmed their partners and families and want to change

Fathers Workbook cover

Are you a father or father figure who has hurt your family and wants to make things better? Or are you someone who works with abusive fathers? If so, this workbook is for you. Many people who hurt their families wish to change but don’t know where to start. If you are one of them, this free resource will help you take the first steps.

It includes practical exercises informed by conversations with children whose fathers have been abusive and mothers who experienced abuse. Also, conversations with fathers who hurt their families, renounced their abuse, and repaired their relationships with their children. You can do the exercises on your own or with the support of a trusted friend or family member, a faith or community leader, or a therapist or counselor.

Healing is possible if you seriously commit to working on yourself! You can start today! Download the workbook here

We would love to know how you have used the workbook. Please send us a message or pictures at

This product was co-produced by Futures Without Violence’s Promising Futures and the Center for Court Innovation. It was generously funded by the Office on Violence Against Women and the Administration on Children, Youth and Families.


Additional materials:

Webcasts on Fatherhood and Domestic Violence

Fathering After Violence: Guidelines and Tool for BIPs

Documentary: Something My Father Would Do

Working with Abusive Fathers in Supervised Visitation

Preventing and Addressing Intimate Violence by Engaging Dads